Christmas Shopping Blues

I don’t know about you? But I’ve come to dread Christmas Shopping! Perhaps being a male in his early 60’s this comes as no big surprise and I’m assuming that most men my age feel this way too? So this year, I’ve decided to do something about it. This year, I’m self-proclaiming to be Christmas shopping exempt! By rule of age and years of dutiful shopping service, I believe I’ve earned the right to be — Christmas shopping Free!

Now maybe this is just another sign of becoming old and grumpy? Having less energy, caring more about comfort than tradition and loosing patience in having to do things that I dislike. Yet warranted or not, I find myself excusable after all the years I have put in — fighting the traffic, looking for parking spaces, fighting the crowds and waiting in the long check-out lines during the Christmas rush.

I’ve “Been there done that!” — And for many, many years!

I believe, that once you have reached a certain age? You then become exempt, get a free pass, don’t have to do the Christmas shopping thing anymore. Instead, you are now well within your rights to just give money instead. “Here’s your envelope and here’s yours, and — ho, ho, ho have a Merry Christmas!”

Gift cards will also do! But even those you have to go and get them first?

Pretty Humbug you might say? No Christmas spirit? No joy in finding that perfect gift anymore? Yep, right, right and right! Christmas shopping at my age has become a stressful and unwanted chore and one that I have declared as no-longer beholding to. I believe I have reached and earned the right of exemption.

So this year, It’s cash and Gift cards for everyone!

Well not everyone of course! Not if’n you don’t want to sleep on the couch for the next month or two that is? But everyone else! Well I suppose my young nieces and nephews might not appreciate an envelope this year? They want presents to unwrap! But hell, at my age, I’m totally clueless in what makes them happy. What they might want? So its here’s some money, buy something on my behalf, wrap it up and put it from me on the Christmas sticker. Done, your welcome, glad it made them happy — ho ho ho!

Now don’t judge me too harshly just yet! Cash or gift cards or digital funds may be more convenient for me and a lazy way for giving presents, but in the end I get what I want (no shopping) and they do too. They can buy whatever pleases them and not get stuck with whatever this clueless old man has wrapped up as a present. It’s a total win-win situation for everybody!

I know what your going to say. Start your Christmas shopping early, or do it online and avoid the stores all together? Yeah but, I still need to know what to get and old men suck at getting presents on their own. Am I right or what? I guess I could ask, but what kind of a surprise would that be? Or get some help, but then its not really me buying the present is it? I’m just paying for it. We’re back to square one as far as I’m concerned.

No, far better to just give a means to buy what they want. Then on Christmas day, you don’t get the fake “oh how nice?” or even worse “you still have the receipt right?”

Look, it hasn’t always been this way! Over the many years I have done my share of dutiful Christmas Shopping. Its just that, when the children are not children anymore, when the exciting patter of tiny little feet running for the Christmas tree on Christmas morning no-longer exists? For me, the magic is gone.

At this stage in my life Christmas has become more about family-time together. About getting everyone together on the same day to share happy memories, good food and the comfort of family and friends. Giving the perfect gift seems less important and endlessly shopping for one? Well, that’s no-longer even on my list!

No, the Joy at Christmas for me now is the joy of not having to face the stressful hassle of playing human bumper-cars in a crowded mall. Or raising a middle finger at someone stealing your parking place. Or waiting in endless lines trying to pay for your new-bought overpriced presents.

If you ask me, the real joy is becoming an old-man non-Christmas shopper. One who’s done his time and is now deemed exempt. And this year, self-proclaimed or not, that old man — is me!

That’s the way that I see it! And on that — you have my WORD!



Merry Christmas All!
Oh, and happy shopping! — lol!


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