Someone who pursues a celebrity or performer, most often a musician or member of a band, typically by following their performance tour in order to gain intimate access to them, and especially to pursue a sexual relationship or encounter. — These are the Groupies!
Tales of a Road Band is an ongoing series sharing my experiences as lead-singer of a touring Country Road Band back in the early 80s. — Corky and The County Outlaws. All true tales (memories) about some of the more colorful experiences that we shared together. Now, for the first time, sharing them with you!
Yes, the girls were there for sex! No easy way to say it. They would hook-up with their chosen band member usually staying until the band had to move on. Then they would simply say goodbye with no regrets, most likely already anticipating the next bunch of guys rolling in to play.
Most of them were young and unattached, or single mothers looking to perk-up their otherwise mundane lives. They lived in the area, frequented certain bars and new the location of each and every associated band-house that the clubs would house the current playing road band. Some nights, they’d even beat you there, waiting for you to show up after the show looking to party.
Now you may already have an image in your mind of what you think a groupie looks like and how the groupie/band-member scenario might play out? A wham-bam thank you Ma’am with a somewhat dopey and always giggling (for your pleasure) sexually adventurous girl. Then the next night, it’s off to a new and different Groupie. But this is far from the truth!
KINDS OF GROUPIES
You may be surprised to know that there are many different kinds of groupies. You might say, if I may be so bold, that they come in a variety of different flavors. And perhaps even more surprising, once a band member hooks up with a groupie, nine times out of ten it’s for the duration of their stay. Usually one groupie per band member for as long as they are booked to play at that particular gig.
And Yes! There are band groupies in every single town! Some are hard-core groupies, usually in pairs, and some, lone singles. Some only do this on occasion and some claim it was their very first time. Um, Okay? Now the hard-core groupies, were of course in it for the excitement and sexual encounters and would quickly hook-up. Others were more picky and a few were “seldom’s” or spur of the moment decision groupies.
Even some that were sincerely looking for mates! Or so they told us?
Now the girls would take care of you and your um, “Needs?” until the band had to move on. Besides sex, they’d show us the better (and cheaper) places to eat, where the laundry mats were and the different stores where we could get what we might need. As a rule, Groupies are always eager to please! Bless their giving little Hearts!
ROAD WIFE GROUPIES
Surprisingly, some groupies took to the role of playing (what we called) old fashioned “Road Wives!” Taking their chosen pick-ups home night after night, cooking for them and even washing their clothes! Sometimes the entire band got invited over for a good home cooked meal.
There were many times on the road when one of the guy’s Road Wife would put on an afternoon feast for all of us just before a show. Why? Beats me! I’m no psychologist. — Mothering instincts perhaps?
Sometimes these girls would even lend the guy’s money if say, they were a little short of cash before payday at the end of the gig. Yeah buddy, if your groupie turned out to be one of these Road wives — you had it made in the shade. Not only did you get all the sex you could handle every night, but you got 3 squares and your clothes washed to boot! All you had to do was show up on time for the nights show and the rest was pretty much taken care of for you by your road wife groupie. Now how strange is that?
Now you might be thinking (as I did in the beginning) that these girls must have an ulterior motive? Looking for a husband? A boyfriend? A father for their child? There’s a whole list of alarming possibilities, but none of these ever came to fruition. When it was time to head out to our next show there was no pressure for further commitment and no pleas to “keep in touch!”
Just here are your clean clothes, it’s been a slice — goodbye, adios — be well!
In fact, on occasion, it was the guys that got hooked on their groupie and not the other way around. And why not? They’ve never been so taken care of before in their entire lives. And the girls were not unattractive. On the contrary, most were young with sexy appealing bodies and meek and mild personalities.
But when it was time to leave for our next gig — the girls stayed behind! They never traveled with us (this I wouldn’t allow!) But they would usually turn up again when we were back in town.
TOO MUCH OFF A GOOD THING?
After a while we became so used to the groupie scene, and wise to all its little synchronicities, the girls got easier and easier to figure out. After all, their end-goal was always the same. And because groupies were so plentiful, we were in no real danger of ever being shutout or going without. This led to some interesting, sometimes dark and often humorous exchanges when we finally realized we had total control! Uh Duh?
Now given total control of a situation, is usually a good thing. But when your young and brazen, on your own and out of town far from prying or judging eyes? Being sexually emboldened with control over the opposite sex? Well, let’s just say that — that’s not necessarily a good thing?
Think back to when you were in your early 20s? What if you, back then, had total control over most every girl that “you” met? See where I’m going here?
So human nature or not. Absolute power tends to corrupt absolutely. And a young man in his sexual prime usually thinks about one thing and one thing only. The problem is — Evolution gave man a brain and a penis, but only enough blood to run one at a time!
So yes, at times things got a little carried away and out of control. But nobody ever got hurt and nothing ever happened that wasn’t 100% agreed upon by all involved. I could tell you stories of naked groupies running free in the band house in the middle of the night? Or doubling up for twice the fun? But I won’t! That would be a little too loose tongued and classless even for me. Not that those things ever really happened. Right?
So instead, here’s an amusing groupie incident for your reading pleasure.
One time, our Lead Guitar player (AT THE TIME!) hooked up with what turned out to be a “Road Wife” groupie. The only time we’d see him was when it was stage time and then “see you later” he and his groupie were off to their temporary love nest. She didn’t even come to the shows, simply showed up as the last set was ending and then off they’d go… Toot-a-loo for now!.. Catch you later!
After our last night of the gig we invited everyone over for a late-night farewell party. Well into the festivities, Lead guitar player walks in the door with his girl. When she slipped out of her coat to stand beside him, the place fell totally silent. Nobody was making a sound, just starring quietly at lead guitar player’s girl. Why? Because she had a very noticeable bump in her belly. — She was pregnant!
Lead Guitar player just stood there looking around the room in confusion. The silence was deafening. What broke the tension was our bass player. He calmly walked up to them, looked her over real good and turned to the still beleaguered guitar player and said — “That was fast!”
This of course broke the tension and had everybody howling with laughter. Except Lead guitar player, who, with a wry grin says “I guess the jokes on you? That’s not her, my girl is still parking the car! This is her sister! And so once again, cue the tearful laughter. end.
BUT WHAT ABOUT DISEASE?
Remember now, this was way back in the early eighties and there was nobody publicly preaching at the time about sexually transmitted diseases. Not that it would have mattered anyways. We were young, in our sexual prime and on our own, free to do as we pleased. And the girls (groupies) were practically throwing themselves at us every night. Back then, catching something while bumping ugly was the last thing on our minds!
Now later, near the end of my Road Band career when the AIDS scare (initially not yet well-defined) started playing out publicly? It did raise attention and forced us (me anyways) to re-evaluate the risks involved within the groupie environment.
So much so, that it did play a part in my decision to eventually dissolve the band and end my playing days.
But that, of course, is a story for later!
BAND MEMBER DISCLAIMER
Now, not all the guys would hook-up, nor all the time! Don’t forget, over the course of my singing career, I had many band members come and go. All individuals with different morals and beliefs. Some would hook-up, some never did. Some on occasion and some pretty much every time!
As for which ones did and which ones didn’t partake? Well I’m throwing nobody under the bus! My lips are sealed! What happened on the road — stays on the road!
THE BAND PHOTOS?
But ah ha! You might say! What about the band photos in your Tales of a Road Band posts? They identify who may or may not be partaking in the sins of groupie-ism! And I’d say — ah ha! — Your wrong!
The 2 or 3 different “Band Photos” I have posted, include only a small proportion of the total number of musicians that have at any one time played in my band over the years. Many former members I simply don’t have photos of, either individually, or in a band group picture together. Remember, this was in the early Eighties, well before personal Smartphones with cameras were introduced.
So when I post something like “Our base player liked his weed or our Lead guitar player hooked-up with a groupie?” Going back to any of the band photos that I’ve provided and trying to identify of whom I may be talking about? Will in most cases (almost always) be misleading!
Whether stated or not, when talking about my “bass player” or our “drummer” etc. The phrase “At the time” should always be inferred!
So why the cloaking of identity? One: I have not been able to track them all down and get their permissions. Two: Therefore I have no idea how identifying them directly would impact their current lives and/or relationships. Also doing so without their permission would be a major breach of trust as you can imagine.
In the end, the musician’s credo of “what happens on the road stays on the road” remains intact. At least as far as identifying names are concerned. This is the way it must be. As for me however? I am sole owner of my past experiences and have given permission to let the tales involving me, fly high! “Eyebrow raising,” or not!
END OF — Tales of a Road Band: The Groupies!
MORE BAND TALES COMING SOON!