So what do you know about Canada? I ask because for the most part, Canada always seems to fly under the radar. Known mostly as a quiet, peaceful nation populated by quiet well-mannered people. So when someone asks about what Canada’s like? It’s oh, nice people, quiet cold country, I guess? But those of us who live here know better. So too, those who have actually visited our country and certainly those prominent on the grand international stage. Dig deeper and Canada will surprise you!
I am a proud Canadian! I’m proud of who we are and what we stand for on the global stage. Oh, we’re far from perfect, who isn’t? Yet among our global peers Canada is seen as one of the best countries in the world.
That’s right! Canada consistently ranks among the best places to live in the world. This year #2 overall! And why not? Canada is a high-tech modern nation, high on the worlds best list in: economies, education, health-care, cultural diversity, conservation and overall population happiness. Just to name a few!
Multi-cultured, accepting, respected, even admired as a peace-loving Nation throughout most of the civilized world. Canada, has a lot to be proud of. Like our top 3 ranking both in political stability, and in quality of life.
And Canada leads the way when it comes to multiculturalism, freedom of religious expression and overall cultural acceptance. Canadians are a diversified Potpourri of many ethnic backgrounds, languages, customs, race, color and creed. All working together in relative harmony.
Surely an example to the rest of the world of a functioning multi-diversified society, not only living in peace, but excelling as a Nation.
Second only to Russia in land mass, Canada is a huge wide-open Nation of clean modern cities enveloped by some of the most scenic and pristine wilderness you have ever seen. Crossed by the Rocky Mountains, with vast acreage of world-renown protected wilderness boasting a plethora of outdoor adventure.
Camping, fishing, hunting, scenic and wildlife photography, hiking trails and pristine rivers and lakes make Canada an outdoor adventurers dream. Nothing says Canada like a golden sunset mirrored on a still freshwater lake with the sounds of nature echoing uninterrupted. A scene readily available to all Canadians.
Why? Because there are more lakes in Canada (about 3 million) than any other country in the world. The province of Ontario alone contains about a third of the world’s fresh water, spread over some 250,000 lakes.
No surprise that “heading up to the cottage” is Canada’s sacred version of getting out of the city. Muskoka chairs, Kevlar canoes, campfire sing-a-longs and the competing sounds of nature. Including the iconic, haunting call of the Canadian northern Loon.
THE CANADIAN IDENTITY — IS HUMOR!
Canadians, for the most part, are known to be polite, friendly and hospitable people. And not just here, but when traveling abroad as well. We are well respected travelers and usually welcomed with open arms.
So much so, that a Canadian flag on a traveler backpack signifies an open, respectful and friendly visitor no matter what country it may be. Yet, this well-earned image of the Canadian traveler does not come without inherent issues. There are, as always, those looking to take advantage of other’s hard-earned gains.
In the case of the Canadian traveler, this comes in the form of Imposters! Those from other countries, falsely displaying the Canadian flag sewn on their backpacks, their suitcases and attire. This, cannot stand!
This blatant stealing of our country’s identity has become a matter of grave (tongue in cheek) concern, and of utmost Nationalistic importance.
And so my fellow Canadian travelers, I beckon you to a “call to arms!”
A CALL TO ARMS
My fellow Canadians. I am calling out to all Canadian travelers abroad, as a patriotic duty and service to your country, to search and expose these frauds, these brazen illegitimate imposters (I suspect Americans) who are secretly posing as Canadians and surely tarnishing our good Canadian name.
I beseech you to keep your eyes open and your ears to the ground and seek out these vile deceivers wherever they may be found.
To hunt them down relentlessly on behalf of our proud nation, our respectful and often over-apologetic people and in the good name of our honorable, yet young and good-looking prime minister, Justin Trudeau!
When, once you’ve found them, I implore you to berate them with rapid-fire targeted questioning. Question them, about our cities, the names of our Provinces, our beers, and of the great and noble Canadian Beaver.
Question them non-stop while drinking them under the table with high alcohol content imported Canadian beer. This will surely loosen their deceitful non-Canadian tongues and reveal their hidden false identities.
Then, while the imposters now gravely inebriated and nakedly exposed, your mission requires but one more step. The removal of our proud national emblem, the Red Canadian Leaf, torn asunder from their belongings.
Note: If it looks like this severing of our sewn on flag may cause damage to their personal belongings, a black marker can be used instead. After all, we are Canadians not animals! Yet, no apologies are to be made no matter how much your Canadian nature calls out for you to do so.
Canada, and Canadians everywhere thank you for your commitment to your country and to this great and noble service in the fight against imposters abroad wherever they may be found.
We urge you to continue your fight to “Protect the North.”
And we thank you in advance for your ongoing success.
In the words of our fellow countryman — “Good going, eh?”
THE CANADIAN RANT
Perhaps above all else, Canadians are known for their apologetic nature and quiet modesty. And compared to our American neighbors to the south, in fact compared to most other countries, I suppose we are. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. In fact, a well-mannered and unobtrusive society goes a long way in promoting peaceful unity and is a desired end-goal for most modern nations.
Although this meek and mild perception of Canadians in the rest of the world bothers no-one here at home (knowing better.) There was a time back in the late 90s and early 2000s when an attempt was made at projecting a more loud and boisterous unity among our people.
I Am Canadian, was once the slogan of Molson Canadian beer from 1994 – 1999, and again between 2000 – 2005. It was also the subject of a popular ad campaign centered on Canadian nationalism. Like all true Canadian attempts at breaking modesty, this one too was done with humor and tongue in cheek.
Canadians are well-known to be friendly, courteous and hospitable by nature. Just ask any foreign traveler who has visited the east coast Maritime Provinces of our country and your sure to get rave revues.
New Brunswick, Nova Scotia and Prince Edward Island have a reputation for having some of the nicest, friendliest, and most hospitable people in the world. And party? Well they certainly can accommodate that too!
A word of advice though, be a little careful when drinking our Canadian beer. Most likely, it’s a little more potent than your used to. You don’t want your party to be over before it even starts, now do you? — Eh?
Monty Hall (Lets make a deal), Alex Trebek (Jeopardy), Director James Cameron (Terminator, Titanic, Avatar), Journalist Morley Safer (60 Minutes), Novelist and Poet Margaret Atwood, Chris Hadfield (Astronaut), and Producer of S.N.L. Lorne Michaels.
Keanu Reeves (Matrix, John Wick) grew up and was schooled in Canada. Ryan Reynolds (Deadpool), William Shatner (Captain Kirk), Jim Carrey (the Grinch), Seth Rogen, Branden Fraser, Donald Sutherland, Leslie Neilson (naked gun), Howie Mandel, Tommy Chong (Cheech and Chong), Glen Ford, Lorne Greene (Bonanza), John Vernon (Jaws Captain), Raymond Burr (Ironside), James Doohan (Scottie of Star Trek), Mike Myers (Wayne’s World).
Canadian artists and musicians list is too long to try and include everyone but here are here are some of the more influential and notable.
PAUL ANKA (Diana), STEPPENWOLF (Born to be Wild), GORDON LIGHTFOOT , ANNE MURRAY (Snowbird), THE GUESS WHO (American Woman), MICHAEL BUBLE, STOMPIN’ TOM CONNORS (The Good Old Hockey Game), ANDY KIM (Rock Me Gently), SWEENEY TODD (Roxy Roller), FIVE MAN ELECTRICAL BAND (Signs), BURTON CUMMINGS, LIGHTHOUSE (Sunny Days), STAMPEDERS (Sweet City Woman), B.T.O. (Takin care of Business), APRIL WINE, and of course THE TRAGICALLY HIP, LEONARD COHEN, BRUCE COCKBURN, BARENAKED LADIES, and superstars NEIL YOUNG, BRYAN ADAMS, RUSH, CELION DION, SHANIA TWAIN, ALANIS MORISSETTE, NICKELBACK, JUSTIN BIEBER and DRAKE! Whew!
Known for our Maple syrup, Canadian Bacon, free health-care and politeness — Yet Canada has given the world so much more! Canadian Fredrick Banting discovered insulin, Alexander Graham Bell invented the telephone. The Canada Arm, snowmobiles and snowblowers, Pablum, peanut butter, the bloody Caesar and Trivial Pursuit!
The Macintosh apple, Yukon Gold potato, Canola and now that marijuana is legal in our country — famous B.C. buds are more popular than ever. We invented Sonar, IMAX, the prosthetic hand, the pacemaker and let us not forget, K-tell Records of course. Yikes!
Electron Microscope, Cardiac Pacemaker, Electric wheelchair, Walkie talkies, Wireless Radio, Plexiglass, Electric Lightbulb, and maybe the greatest Canadian invention of all? — The Wonder Bra! Your welcome!
Oh, and Superman! — Joseph Shuster was a Canadian born comic book artist best known for co-creating the DC Comics character Superman, with writer Jerry Siegel, in Action Comics #1.
Hence the Superman lead photo unveiling the Canadian Insignia!
He too, proudly proclaiming…
I AM CANADIAN!