Laugh Out Loud!

Laughter is the best medicine! It’s music for the soul, good for your health and your mental well-being. It’s language is universal, part of the human vocabulary produced and recognized by all of us. Transcending race, color, creed and culture, to laugh is to be human! Without it, some say, we’d all go insane!

Laughter reduces pain, stress, and connects people emotionally. It releases the endorphins in our brains that induces euphoria and in the process makes us more attractive to the rest of the human race.

Happy girls they say, are the prettiest, and a good sense of humor is among the top sought-after qualifications of women who are looking for a mate. — Smile they say and the world smiles with you!

And laughter, as we all know, is highly contagious. The unpretentious giggling of an infant or a child, bringing smiles to our faces. Social laughter creates bonds between strangers and reinforces bonds with those we know.

“Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.” ― Victor Borge

Some of our fondest memories include laughter, shared among family and friends.

Here’s a fond laughter-memory of mine…

One night, long ago, when my brother and sister and I were still very young; dad was left babysitting us while mom got a rare break and went off to Bingo. Dad was a long-haul truck driver gone for weeks on end so having him alone to ourselves was a real treat. He too loved these rare moments alone with his kids and always tried his best to entertain us with something special.

This night he was going to let us help him make some chocolate pudding. In the old days, instant pudding came in a box of several packaged powders to be blended with milk. So, we gathered round the kitchen table and in the middle dad put our vintage stainless-steel mixer.

It was an one-piece unit with a metal bowl sitting on a circular rotatable base and a motorized vertical mixing spoon or whisk. A red power-button on the handle that controlled the spin of the whisk attached to a motor unit that allowed for tilting-up and tilting-down.

So in goes the milk, the powders on top. Dad attaches the whisk and lowers it, holds the red power-button down and with a loud whirling noise the mixer comes to life. We are mesmerized, as kids we’ve only seen mom do this and never so up-close!

We inch our noses even closer when dad asks “who wants to lick the mixing spoon when its done?”

And that’s when things started to go wrong!

Deciding the mix was good enough, he raised the attached rotating-whisk but forgetting one important step along the way. — He didn’t let go of the red power-button while he was raising it! — And newly-mixed chocolate pudding… sprayed everywhere!

On the walls, the ceiling, the table and chairs! On all our clothes! And because us-kids were nose-close in anticipation, all of our faces got splattered with chocolate pudding. The power-button finally was released but the damage was done — and a shocked silence fell over all of us.

As kids, we didn’t know how to react, some of us on the verge of crying. That is until the laughter started. When dad saw our chocolate-splattered startled faces, he began laughing uncontrollably. This set us all off, soon everyone was pointing and laughing at each other together.

The one person who didn’t really find it funny was mom when she got home and had to finish our poor job of cleaning pudding off the walls and ceiling. I suppose getting chocolate pudding stains out of 3 sets of pajamas didn’t thrill her either? Still, after hearing the story retold, she too could be seen hiding a grin.

That memory, that sudden unrestrained laughter we shared together that day will always and forever be there with me. In fact, it still makes me giggle when I think of it today.

WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?

Although laughter is universal, what really tickles your funny-bone may differ from mine part-depending on your preference of humor. For example, Physical humor (slapstick), self-deprecating (making fun of yourself), Surreal or silly humor (ie Monty python) to name a few.

Humor can also be age-related, the young laughing hysterically at things most adults have grown out of such as Bodily-function humor (i.e. fart jokes.) Of course not all adults grow out of this phase, their inner-youth forever giggling at the funny-farting side of life.

Then there’s visual-humor, as in follies, mishaps and foolish stunts gone wrong as seen on YouTube or TV programs dedicated to such things. In the old days ‘Candid camera’ and ‘America’s funniest videos.’ Paid-for-view networks today like the comedy channel provide similar programming in the same vein. Foolish people doing foolish things that tickle our funny-bones and cute pets and animals doing the same.

And of course we have our own favorite comedian’s, past and present, and comedy shows we like or have liked in the past. For instance I loved Benny Hill when I was a kid, and for me George Carlin was king of comedy back when stand-up was all the rage.

So, what makes you laugh?

What tickles your funny-bone?

Here are some, that tickled mine!

Note: Some adult situations, language and Inferred stereotypes of old.

THE SHORT END OF THE STICK

In March 2017, a five-member panel of the College of Physicians and Surgeons of Ontario’s discipline committee, found that dermatologist Dr. Rodion Andrew Kunynetz sexually abused a patient by touching her breasts under her bra without clinical justification.

He was also found guilty of “disgraceful, dishonorable or unprofessional conduct” by failing to give two patients proper warning or explanation for removing some of their clothing.“Okay Miss, I’m going to check your blood pressure now — so let’s get you naked?”

But it’s the final and lesser charge of inappropriate sexual contact that is at the heart of this story as several woman patients have accused the Dr. of rubbing his penis against their legs during examinations! This of course no-laughing matter!

However the claim made in rebuttal of this accusation by the Doctors lawyers?

Well you tell me!

His Lawyer responded with a rather “Unique Defense.” They claim the Good Doctor’s Penis is Too small and his belly is Too big to be physically able to perform this accused act of penis-rubbing. — You’ve got to be kidding?

 

Too Fat!
Too small!

 

 

 

 

 

 

So how did the defense go on to disprove this penis-rubbing claim you might ask?

Seriously You’ll never guess!

They hired another Doctor to examine him and assess whether this was physically possible! They covered both possibilities; while the accused Dr. ‘had an erection’ — and when ‘he did not!’ Seriously folks, you can’t make this stuff up! “Okay now, let’s try it with you having an erection. — Awwkwaaard!

Dr. Gerald Brock examined Kunynetz for the college and conducted a series of maneuvers using himself to represent a patient sitting on the side of an examination couch with the accused Dr. Kunynetz posing as himself. ( And trying to rub his penis against him?)

Oh man!

THE VERDICT

And Surprise! Surprise! The defense-hired expert concluded that No, the accused Dr. was not physically able to perform this act. I Wonder if they presented video evidence of his test? Although found guilty on the two other charges, he was acquitted on the Penis-rubbing-charge because apparently he was “Just Too fat” with a penis “Too small” to make it happen.

So in the end you might say?

They could only convict “that little prick”on the lesser, “smaller” charges!

True story!

Although I do apologize if it happened to — ‘rub you the wrong way!’

SHORT FUNNIES

A redhead tells her blonde stepsister, “I slept with a Brazilian!”
The blonde replies, “Oh my God! You slut! How many is a brazilian?”

I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised?

A study found women who carry a little extra weight live longer than the men who mention it! — YIKES!

The other day, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick but I accidentally passed her a glue stick. — She still isn’t talking to me!

My wife accused me of being immature, so I had to tell her to get out of my fort.

Two pirates, Morty and Sol, meet in a bar. Sol has a patch over one eye, a hook for a hand, and a wooden peg leg. “Ye gads, matey,” says Morty. “What happened to ya?” Sol says, “Me pirate ship was attacked, and a lucky shot lopped off me leg. So now I got me a wooden peg.”

“And yer hand?” asks Marty.

“When me ship sank, a shark bit me hand off. So now I got me a hook.”

“OK, but what’s with the eye patch?”

“I was standin’ on a dock, and the biggest seagull I ever saw poops right in me eye.”

“But ya don’t go blind from no seagull poop.”

“True,” says Sol. “But it was me first day with the hook.”

GEORGE CARLIN

Perhaps my favorite comedian of all time! His grasp on human stupidity is unmatched. George is in his prime in the following video about Airlines and Flying. It’s about 11:00 min. long but well worth the time. I dare you not to laugh!

 

George Carlin – on airlines and flying

 

WRAP UP

So there you have it! A short story of a court case with an unusual defense strategy, an old laugh-memory of mine, a few one-liners and a YouTube video of comedian George Carlin. Hope you had a chuckle or two or at least a smile. And if you happen to find yourself in a better mood right now? Well I guess I’ve accomplished what I started out to do. Bring a little cheer into your life and make you — Laugh out Loud!

By the way? Who was your favorite comedian growing up? And what about T.V. shows? — Saturday Night Live? Benny Hill? Bizarre with Super-Dave? Give us a shout and let us know what makes you laugh!

Okay now Shhhh! Fun’s over! Go to Bed!

“You don’t stop laughing because you grow old. You grow old because you stop laughing.”Michael Pritchard

WordofWayne©

 

 

 

 

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11 thoughts on “Laugh Out Loud!

  1. I am a sucker for good humor. All types of humor. From funny looking people to face plants to kids doing funny things. Heck I’ll find myself laughing at people’s misfortunes.
    My favorite comedians/actors has to be Chris rock Jim Carey, Mr. BEAN, Terry crews, Kevin Hart, Adam Sandler, Steve Carell…

    Movie that made me wet my pants like Bruce Almighty and Evan Almighty, Grown ups.

    Jeff Dunham and Aries spears best stand up comedians.

    Laughter is the medicine of the soul

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Francis! Mr. Bean also a favorite of mine. Not so much his movies but his variety short-story skits before. Like when he got his head stuck in the turkey trying to get his watch back after stuffing it. Just his funny face alone makes me laugh!

      Like

  2. Benny Hill was terrific, you had to love the women he kept chasing — of course in these humorless days of politically correct cancel culture bullshit, Benny Hill would be the first to go; and George Carlin for sure, and Richard Pryor and so many other great comedians of the past. The current slew of so called late night comedians are NOT FUNNY! Fk ‘em all.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I with you Bill! Humor has changed, our era is gone and what funny once was is no more. Saturday Night Live is unwatchable today as are most of the late-night talk shows as far as comedy goes. Finding a laugh on the Boob-tube these days is like finding an honest politician. — Near impossible! And that is no-laughing matter!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Right, the late-night fools and Saturday Night Live ARE unwatchable — and politics ruined them. These unfunny sh’heads are like the talking heads who pretend to give the news, except nobody gives the news anymore, they just cram their biased opinions in your face — so I turn the bastard off and watch King of Queens.

        Liked by 1 person

  3. My faves growing up were Carlin, of course, Richard Pryor, and Eddie Murphy was a legend when “Raw” came out. My faves of modern-day are Bill Burr and (before he was canceled) Louie CK. I love that raunchy, irreverent style and Sarah Silverman is a gem for fans of that genre.

    P.S. for fans of the really old school, raunchy style checkout “Wildman Steve” on youtube.

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